It may be tough finding a man or women of God whom you can connect with but as single Christians it is essential you are not unequally yoked. So as a believer in Christ you should not be dating, courting, fellowshipping with an unbeliever. So let’s look at what an unbeliever is, an unbeliever is a person who has not given their life to Christ, who is not a follower of Christ, or a person who does not live for Christ.
Many single Christians who desire marriage and are frustrated that they cannot seem to find someone in the church, then decide to go to the world to find what they desire.
Sometimes they may not even be seeking but when an admirer comes along and woos them they cannot resist and find themselves in an ungodly relationships.
If as a Christian you are seeing, dating or courting an unbeliever you are unequally yoked and walking in disobedience to God.
"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of the living God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, 'I will make dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Therefore, go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you, and I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty'." 2 Cor. 6:14-18, ESV
Mixing righteousness with lawlessness is forbidden, right mixed with wrong, hot mixed with cold turns lukewarm.
This week I bumped into an old school friend, it was funny as we almost walked past each other I didn’t recognise her but I heard her say ‘God is sooo good’ as she spoke with someone on the phone. My ears pricked up just as she yelled my name. We hadn’t seen each other since we left school so we had a lot of catching up to do. Once we realised we were both Christians the topic of conversation was Jesus, the church and eventually she mentioned her partner.
She has been in a relationship for five years and just recently God has told her ‘separate yourself’. So she has told her partner he can no longer stay with her. I asked if he was a believer, she said he was not saved but he did believe in god, she couldn’t be with anyone if they didn’t believe in god. It has been a struggle for her but she is trying to obey God.
This the bible says is unequally yoked. Her partner hasn't given his life to Christ, and as they have been sleeping together she is in sin. She has not totally ended the relationship as he is still her partner and she still loves him. He tells her she could give in, all she has to do is repent and God will forgive her.
Romans 6:1-2 says what shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? 2 Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it? Read the whole chapter in Romans 6 to get a better understanding of God’s grace and our sin.
Amos 3:3 Can two walk together unless they agree.
There are many single Christians believing that because the person they are with believes there is a God it is ok, in fact it is walking in disobedience with God and you are in fact walking with the devil.
When you are in an unequally yoked relationship it can really challenge your Christian walk. If you can imagine standing on a table holding hands with someone standing on the floor and you are both tugging at each other, as you tug, the person standing on the table will eventually be pulled you down to the same level as the person on the floor.
Eventually your spiritual walk will be greatly affected by the unbeliever, you are not on the same spiritual playing field and your Christian walk will be compromised. The unbeliever will not have the same convictions about sex before marriage and many other things and you will eventually fall into sin.
If you are waiting for your unbelieving partner to become a Christian, you cannot change them only God can. You may need to separate yourself from them and surrender them to God, keep praying for them and if it is God’s will for you to be together if they do give their lives to Christ then Amen.